


Hello? This is the Hellblazer Bureau

by Nellblazer



Category: Constantine (TV), DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), Hellblazer
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Flirting, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, John Constantine Needs A Hug, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Trauma, Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-28
Updated: 2020-12-28
Packaged: 2021-03-11 05:00:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28389654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nellblazer/pseuds/Nellblazer
Summary: Sequel to A Haunting in HilltopYou and John never get long together but you’re there to pick up his pieces. On this night, you realise just how much of a toll his lifestyle can take on him.*Please do not replicate my work anywhere else without my express permission*
Relationships: John Constantine/Reader
Comments: 6
Kudos: 26





	Hello? This is the Hellblazer Bureau

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [A Haunting In Hilltop](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18328127) by [Nellblazer](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nellblazer/pseuds/Nellblazer). 



> Warnings: Grief, trauma, PTSD, coping mechanisms
> 
> (Possible proof reading errors)

Life was a whirlwind with John Constantine.

After my haunting, he'd come over for brews sometimes, a general de-stressing chat and the occasional snog. He never got long to stick around though, his phone was always blowing up with urgent calls and messages.

More than once it had interrupted when things were just about to get hot and heavy. It was starting to get annoying.

Mostly during those first few weeks after the exorcism, I spent my free time gutting the loft. When I'd truly gone through the items up there, it had broken my heart to see just how wretched that poor girl's life must have been. The sad drawings, the scribbled on paper with the barely literate handwriting and the scratch marks on the wall.

I stripped everything to the bare foundations, sanding down the timber and laying down carpet, repainting the walls and installing an office up there, along with a new bed. I couldn't pretend it was for a noble reason like increasing the house's value or anything, I was just hoping maybe John could stay over sometime.

It was 4am the next time he came to the house, banging on the door in a frenzy and I raced out of bed in just an oversized t-shirt and nothing else, opening it in a panic.

“What's wrong?!” I pant, seeing a very bedraggled John on the doorstep, blood all over him.

“I need....I need....” his voice is breaking and he looks traumatised.

“Come in,” I pull him across the threshold but he tries to protest.

“I'm messing up your carpet!” he attempts to stay put.

“I don't care. Take your shoes off and come with me.”

He gives up, shucking his boots off and closing and locking the door behind him before following you to the bathroom. I turn on the taps, even going as far as to pour bubble bath into the frothing water before standing in front of John who was just stock still.

“Take off your clothes,” I say as gently as I can.

“Why?”

“I'm going to clean them.”

“Oh...right....yeah. Okay,” he blinks before stripping down to nothing and I take the pile from him, going to my utility room and dumping them in the washer/dryer with a load of detergent.

When I get back into the room, he hasn't even moved. He's just still stood there buck naked, staring at the wall.

“John?” I approach him.

“Huh? What?” he focuses finally. “That were quick.”

“Water should be good now. Let's get you in the tub,” I try to steer him.

Normally he'd be full of jokes and wisecracks about finally managing to be in his birthday suit around me but I took from his quiet demeanour that he was not himself at all tonight. The way he clung to my hand as I got him in the bath, he needed to be taken care of right now.

So I pulled up a chair and cleaned him with a flannel, got all the blood and gore off of his skin and he barely said a word, barely even moved except when I directly asked him to. It was like he'd turned into a doll for me to manipulate.

“Talk to me,” I try to break through the barrier he's erected. “What happened?”

“Can't say,” he whispers, eyes misting up.

I don't push it, he's on edge enough as it is. I just busy myself with leaning him back so I can wash his hair, deep red strands slowly coming back to that dirty blond colour and the water fogging into a dark brown.

Twice I fill the tub to get him shiny and new again and every time I shampoo his hair, his eyes flutter closed and he leans into it. It's the most interaction I get out of him during the whole time.   
Whatever he just went through, it must have been really bad.

“All done,” I declare. “Let's get you dried off.”

He steps out and I have to towel him down, making his hair stick up in spikes as I ruffle it to dislodge the droplets that have settled there.

“I don't have anything that can fit you really,” I apologise. “I've just got this dressing gown for now. Your clothes should be dry in about a couple of hours.”

He just silently holds his hand out to take the item and I help him into my fluffy pastel pink dressing gown that barely comes to his knees but at least it keeps him covered and I catch him running his hands across the soft material like it was comforting to him.

“You look tired. Do you want to lie down?” I ask.

John nods mutely and I pull him up to the loft, leading him to the bed with the brand new sheets and tuck him into it. Sat, as I was, on the edge of the bed, I didn't know what to do. I wasn't sure whether to give him some space or coddle him a little bit longer.

I've brought his phone up with us and it rings, shrill against the quiet of the room and he physically winces.

“I can't!” he shakes his head furiously. “Not now! Not now!”

I decline the call for him, trying to soothe him where he's tensed up again but they keep ringing. John's getting more worked up by the second.

“Can't fucking do this! Tell 'em to stop! Not now!”

“Okay! Okay!” I go over to the desk so it gives John some distance before looking at the screen which shows ' **Dickhead calling** ' and answering. “Hello?”

“Where's John?” a Cockney accent comes though, male.

“He's busy at the moment, can I take a message?”

“Who the bloody hell are you?” the voice gets defensive.

“The person screening his calls right now. Now can I take a message, only it's not a good time,” I say more firmly.

“Are you that girl he keeps sneaking off to see?”

“Maybe, I don't know. Did you want something or can you call back later?”

“Listen, I'm John's friend Chas. If he's there and he's just trying to get his end away, tell him I need him back here.”

“He's not trying to get his end away. He's upset and he's going nowhere.”

There's a long sigh on the other end, “Look, darlin', I ain't got time for John's games right now so just tell him to get over here.”

“You're not listening to me,” I get angry. “He's a fucking mess right now. Even if he was in any state to come visit you, I wouldn't let him go because he's _that_ cut up about something. So either you leave a fucking message, you come the fuck over or you fuck the fuck off.”

There's silence on the line for the longest while before this Chas person speaks again, “Take a message then. Tell him there's a vampire gathering in the Nantwich graveyards. I suppose it can wait for him to disrupt it.”

I scribble down the notes on some paper, “Got it.”

“Is he really that bad?” Chas asks.

“Practically catatonic,” I whisper so John doesn't hear me.

“Fuck...take good care a' him, alright? You got this number if you need me. Any time of the night. I'll call tomorrow.”

“Bye.”

I click off before returning to John who's stopped thrashing around now and I re-tuck him in, smoothing back his hair.

“I'll leave you to get some rest,” I'm about to stand up when he grabs for me desperately.

“Don't leave,” he begs. “Please just...don't leave me alone.”

“Well alright then but budge up so I can get in the bed too,” I gently push him and he scoots over.

I crawl in, back to his chest as he uses me like a teddy bear, arms curled around me tightly. Gradually I can feel his breathing sync with mine.

“It were a little lad,” he says out of nowhere. “Not any older than four. Nasty little spirit had possessed his mum. It were her sister that got in contact with me to start with, convinced something more was going on in the personality change than just a bad mood. Well...she weren't wrong. I went to exorcise her but the thing were old, very old, much older than the spook that used to be in this room. It used the kid to keep me away, holding it hostage.

Sister came in at the wrong time, spirit ejected into her and killed the boy in front of me before I could get to him, bludgeoned him with an ornament. All that blood on me....that was his. Four fucking years old. I didn't do enough, I should've done more.”

“You couldn't have known the sister would visit,” I try to calm him because I can feel him shaking behind me.

“I've been doing this for so long and death I can handle,” he's barely audible. “But kids...not kids. I can't just brush that off.”

“I'm here, John. Just try and sleep. If you have nightmares, I'm right here.”

It takes him a long while before his grip on me loosens as sleep takes hold. I'm wide awake by this point, horrified by what he's had to go through and so I just lie there for as long as my bladder will let me before I eventually have to leave.

When I get up to the top of the loft again, John's phone starts ringing and I race to it so it doesn't wake him up. It's an unknown caller.

“Hello, John Constantine's phone?”

“Hi, I was told to ring this number if things got worse?” a young voice replies nervously. “Uh...I think, I think it's found me.”

“Uh, I'm new to the team so can you walk me through it so far?” I lie, like John has some kind of back up.

“I've had a werewolf stalking me for days. I moved houses but it has my scent now. I killed one of its pack members by accident. The full moon is tomorrow and I don't stand a chance. Can he help me?”

“Yes he can help you. Tell me where you are. I'll get the message to him urgently.”

I'm given the address and the person hangs up. I now have a small notepad of memos for John for when he gets up.

“Making yourself indispensable to me, are ya?” John's voice from the bed.

He sounds much brighter than last night but I'm concerned he might be shoving the trauma aside. Then again, sounds like he does that on a daily basis.

“You were indisposed,” I turn in the chair. “I was helping.”

“Aye, I heard,” he gets up, still in the pink dressing gown. “You know there's something right sexy about you tellin' me best mate to fuck off.”

“He was being an arse about things.”

“Oh no doubt. He does that. So what was that phone call for?”

“Alex and the case of the revenging werewolf. Needs your help.”

“Revenging werewolf?” he snorts, coming over. “This isn't a detective agency, you know.”

“And I'm not your secretary but here I am,” I gesture to the pad.

“Oh I'd kill to see you in a sexy office outfit,” he groans. “So what's with the makeover up here? Not what I expected you to do with it.”

“It's...uh....” I can feel myself getting embarrassed.

He narrows his eyes at me, towering over me, still suave even in a fluffy robe, “You did this for me, didn't you?”

“That's some ego you got there,” I try to deflect.

“Don't try to con a con man, lass,” he tuts. “I know when people are lying to me. So why did you give me a bedroom and an office? Hoping I'd stay longer?”

I can't even speak now, I'm so mortified that he saw right through me. He just grins at me though.

“Coulda just asked, luv. I'd be more than happy to spend more time with you. I don't get _enough_ time with you. This is unheard of for me to see a bird this much and not have shagged her by now.”

“That's quite an assumption that I'd sleep with you.”

“Again, I know when people are lying to me,” he tips my chin up with two fingers. “I remember how you were grinding on me the last time we fooled around. The sheer amount of wanking I've had to do when I get back after seeing you is obscene. You get me so wound up.”

It should be crass, cringy even what he's admitting to but I take it as a sign that he really wants me.

“Anyway,” he laughs. “I'm touched that you put this much effort in for me, even more so that you took care of me last night without a second thought. Nobody's ever done that for me before. Thank you.”

“You comforted me once, it's only fair.”

“Now I'd best slip out of this thing before I go do me work because you know me, I never get five minutes to meself. I'll be back later for you though. Much nicer being here than me cold flat. Give us a kiss to start the day with.”

So I stand up and kiss him before he tears the notes from the notepad and disappears down to collect his clothes. I just go back to the bed and try to nap. I was running on empty right now and the sheets were still warm...

**

By the time I'd woken up properly, it was the afternoon.

I had post waiting for me on the mat and I opened it in a daze, scanning the document which took me a few tries until the words settled into my brain. When they did, I screamed a little in surprise.

It was a letter from the bank that my mortgage was fully paid off.

I called them, certain it must be a mistake but they just said a third party had donated the money. I didn't know what to make of it.

The rest of the day I had off from work and just pottered around the house, still wondering what the hell had happened.

John came by about seven in the evening, looking much chirpier and he almost tipped me over giving me a kiss.

“Good to be back,” he grins.

“Are you....are you okay?” I ask gingerly.

“No but I'm stable,” he shrugs. “Not the first time I've lost a kiddo on the job and won't be the last but I just needed to get everything out last night so I can be on my game today. One werewolf killed. How was your day?”

“Oh I slept a lot,” I take his coat and put it on the hangar. “And the strangest thing happened. My mortgage has been completely paid up apparently.”

“Oh it finally came through,” John says casually, flopping onto my sofa. “Took a while.”

“Wait, _what_?!” I jump over the back of it to crash land next to him. “That was you?!”

“Well....yeah. I take care a' those I'm close to. Not a big deal, luv. Just want you to be financially secure.”

“You paid....you paid off my house for me?! I....thank you!”

“No, darlin', thank _you_ ,” he leans forward, stroking my cheek. “For everything you've done for me since the spook in your loft. Just my way to pay it back. I do have another offer as well if you're interested?”

“Oh?”

“You saying about being me secretary,” his mouth twitches into a smirk. “I heard your phone manner and how you're willing to bat for me having a break now and then. If you'll be me secretary for real, I'll pay you more than you're getting now. I'm not hard up for cash.”

“Then why do you live in a flat?”

“Why would I want loads a' rooms when it's just me?” he gives me a weird look. “Don't be daft. So, what do you say? Shall we start the Hellblazer Bureau?”

“Hellblazer Bureau?”

“Yeah, you know. I'm like a trailblazer but through Hell mostly. Oh come on, that's right clever! Don't give me that face!”

“So you actually want the detective agency then?” I laugh.

“Aye, why not? Having an actual team behind me might be a nice change. Plus I'll be your boss and that just opens up _so_ many new avenues for fun.”

John pushes me back down on the sofa so I'm lying flat and he's hovering over me. His lips meet my neck, just kissing softly, teasingly.

“Say yes?” he asks hopefully. “I get to see you more then. You can set my schedules too. We can properly make use of that office?”

“You don't have to seduce me into saying yes,” I bring his face close to mine. “Just make sure you can pay me before I quit a stable job, okay?”

“Here,” he fishes out his phone, logging into a banking app and showing me the screen. “That good enough?”

“John....” my voice trails away as I stare at the number in bewilderment. “You're a.....”

“Multi-millionaire? Aye. People keep leaving me things in their wills as thanks, you know, lonely old folks and what not. Mounts up over the years. I'm just not a particularly big spender. Is that enough to cover your bills n' all?”

“More than enough. Fuck it, I'll quit my job right now,” I kiss him. “But you'll need to get me an office phone and some business cards for yourself.”

“Been meaning to change me old ones for a while anyway,” he smiles brightly. “Are we really doing this? Working together?”

“If you want me.”

“I always want you, luv....in several different ways. Now, let's get upstairs and you can tell me what we need. I've never been a boss before.”

“I'm not gonna have to call you, Mr Constantine, am I?” I joke as we go up the new ladder to the loft office.

“Nah, just make sure you wear something skimpy but business like and I'm happy.”

We spent the evening noting down things for how to decorate our newly dubbed office, I quit my job effectively immediately and John and I finally got a couple of hours to ourselves to christen the new bed.

“Tut tut,” I tap him on the nose. “Fucking the secretary.”

“Just don't tell the wife, and by wife I mean Chas,” John nuzzles into me. “He's already on me case enough. Oh lass, I'm so glad I finally got to have you. Worth the wait for sure.”

“I should think so,” I poke my tongue out at him. “Here's to spending some more time with you.”

“I look forward to every second of it,” he beams.

**

In three months the Hellblazer Bureau had taken on a life of its own.

Word had spread online and I was fielding regular calls. I'd learned enough by now to tell when the genuine article was ringing in and when I would be making referrals to crisis teams instead. I became something of a part secretary, part welfare dispatcher.

I did eventually meet Chas, who definitely did have something of an old married couple type of relationship with John. I found him quite funny though. He was fairly good natured.

The bed ended up being moved out of the loft as a second desk replaced it and Chas started working up there too. John and I moved into the normal bedroom.

My house had become half an office and half a halfway house for these two and slowly their demon hunting acquaintances too. I became a recognised name in the underground community, not just for being John's girl but also for taking care of everyone who came through both physically and mentally.

When John was installing the plaque on the wall outside my house, proudly proclaiming in brass that this was the Hellblazer House, he stepped back and slung his arm around me.

“What d'ya think, lass?” he waves at it.

“I think it's wonky but that kind of suits how chaotic this place is anyway,” I smile up at him.

“Well I'm not changing it now.”

“Don't, leave it.”

“So what's on the agenda today, luv?”

“Actually you have a free evening. Chas is taking over.”

“A free evening, eh? I wonder just how I'm gonna spend that....” he muses before grabbing me and slinging me over his shoulder, marching me inside and dumping me on the bed we'd been sharing for a while now. “How about I spend the whole time right between these pretty thighs?”

**

“ _Hello? This is the Hellblazer Bureau, office of John Constantine. For ghost related problems, press 1. For demon related problems press 2. For supernatural creatures and beasts, press 3. For anything else, press 4.”_


End file.
